INC: Ninja's are only the Beginning
by Mika Saito
Summary: Part 1 of the Insanity Chronicles. The entire Naruto cast gets pranked, starting with the Akatsuki. Rated for possible language.
1. Chapter 1

_AN: Okay. I know I still have 3 other storied unfinished, one of which I'm supposed to be working on... but this entire story is something I'm working on with a friend. _

_It is a humorous story, not many of the characters will be completely in-character (or even in-character at all,) and the time line will be completely messed up, so please, don't tell me that I've got things messed up, I know I do, I did that on purpose._

_I hope you enjoy, and find at least some amusement in this random idea created by Sumi and myself. If you do, review!_

_The Insanity Chronicles: Ninja's are only the Beginning._

_By: Mika Saito and Sumi_

**_Chapter 1- In Which We Steal From Oreo-kun._**

"Come on. Hurry and grab them before he wakes up," Rei urged her accomplice, watching Orochimaru for any signs of waking.

"You grab one, I'll get the other," Sumi suggested, positioning herself to the right of Orochimaru's chair.

"All right," Rei agreed, moving to the left of the chair. "On the count of three." Their identical red eyes met, and they grinned mischievously.

"Ichi," Sumi started.

"Ni."

"San!" They pulled the earrings out simultaneously, careful not the yank on his ears.

"Run," Rei jerked her head towards the door, side stepping away from the chair.

Together they dashed from the room, gently closing the door behind them before running down the hall laughing madly, their prizes clutched in their hands.

* * *

The next morning Sumi and Rei sat at the table in the small dinning room, quietly discussing their next mission- to get Orochimaru, or Oreo as they called him, to stop wearing make up.

They were just getting to the part of figuring out how to hide his make up supply when Oreo himself stormed into the room.

"All right, you mangy brats, what did you do to my earrings?" He demanded, gold eyes sparking dangerously.

"Whatever do you mean, Uncle dearest?" They asked in unison.

"Don't mess with me, _brats_, just tell me what you did with the damn things." The two shared a look.

"We really don't know what you're talking about, uncle," Sumi smiled innocently.

"You warned us against touching them... so why would we steal them?" Rei continued, her smile somehow just as innocent, despite the snakebite piercing.

Oreo closed his eyes and growled, grinding his teeth together.

"I'll make you a deal," he ground out, clearly frustrated. The two exchanged another look.

"What type of deal?" Sumi asked.

"One I think you two will enjoy."

"What're your terms, dearest uncle?" She questioned.

"You give me my earrings back, and promise not to touch them again. In return I'll give you two a few new play toys."

"Toys? We aren't children, uncle," Rei admonished mock-seriously.

"Human toys, brats. Do we have a deal?" He asked, drumming his fingers on the table impatiently.

The two leaned together and began a whispered conversation.

"What do you think, Sumi? Is it worth it?"

"I dunno. We worked hard to get our prize..."

"Is there any way to get both?" Rei asked.

"Hmm..."

"Well?" Oreo interrupted. They turned to glare at him, then continued their conversation.

"We took them once, we can take them again," Rei said, pulling her earring out of her pocket.

"All right," Sumi agreed, dropping her earring in Rei's hand.

"We'll return them, uncle. But first, who gets to be our toy?"

"Toy_s_, brat. You give me the earrings and you'll get to play with the Akatsuki."

"Really?"

"We really get to play with Itachi and Diedara?" They asked in unison. At Oreo's nod they squealed, an evil glint coming to their eyes.

"Deal," Rei said, tossing the earrings at him.

"You'll leave with Itachi tomorrow. Try not to get into too much trouble before then." He put the earrings in and left the room.

"So... How are we going to get them back before tomorrow night? He's suspicious now," Rei slumped in her seat, red eyes watching Sumi, hoping for the older teen to get a brilliant idea.

"We'll find a way..." Sumi smirked evilly.

* * *

_AN: Let me know what you think. The entire story is going to be full of pranks, so if there's one you'd like to see pulled on a specific character tell me in a review and Sumi and I will try to find a way to work it in._

_Also, this is only the first part of the Insanity Chronicles. We intend to visit other anime/manga in other parts. If there's one you'd like to see, involving certain characters, let me know in a review!_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Chapter 2- In Which Non-Ninja's Join The Akatsuki.**_

"Bye Uncle Oreo!" Sumi and Rei waved over their shoulders before turning to chase a grumbling Itachi down the path away from Oreo's hidden home.

_**-2 hours later-**_

"Are we there yet?" Rei asked, for the hundredth time since they'd left Oreo.

"No," Itachi growled, trying not to lash out at the two teens.

"Are you sure about that?" Sumi asked. Itachi growled in response, sending the two into hysterical laughter.

_**-6 hours later-**_

"I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts, there they are a-standing in a row. Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head..." Sumi and Rei sang loudly as they followed Itachi into the Akatsuki compound.

"Would you two just shut the hell up already? You've been singing those same lines for the past TWO HOURS," Itachi snapped before turning on his heel and disappearing into the nearest building.

"... I think we're already getting to him..." Rei commented.

"He's gonna be easy to crack," Sumi agreed. They looked at each other and grinned darkly.

"How about we go see what else we can get into?" Rei suggested, pointing towards a conveniently open door to their right.

"Good idea."

_**-1 hour later-**_

"Where are our new members?" Kisame asked, highly amused as Itachi paced the floor.

"Don't know, don't care," Itachi answered shortly.

"The two actually got under your skin?" Deidara asked teasingly from his relaxed position on a black couch.

"No," Itachi snapped.

"We'd beg to differ on that matter, Itachi-kun," a laughing voice said from the direction of the doorway. Four pairs of eyes turned towards them. Sumi and Rei, already wearing Akatsuki cloaks, stood there, grinning.

Itachi's eyes narrowed. "What do you know?" He muttered to himself. Sumi and Rei silently laughed, moving to sit on either side of Deidara.

"Hey, Deidara?" Sumi looked at the blond.

"Yeah?" He raised an eyebrow, watching the silver-blue haired teenager.

"Do you know whose room is at the end of the hallway to the right of the courtyard?" Rei asked, her own red gaze firmly on Itachi. They knew whose room it was, the old Uchiha clothing had given it away. Itachi tensed.

"That's Itachi's room," Deidara told them, looking back and forth between the two. "Why?"

"It looked a little dull, so we re-decorated it," Rei told him matter-of-factly.

"I hope you don't mind, Itachi-kun," Sumi added, as an after thought.

"What did you do?" Deidara asked, choking back a laugh at Itachi's disbelieving look.

"Well... as much as Sumi and I love red and black, we though it was missing something... It needed to be brighter..."

"So we added highlights of pink!" Sumi finished.

Itachi's eyes widened as he leapt from his seat and dashed out of the room.

"This I have to see," Deidara grinned, following.

"Agreed," Sasori chimed in, trailing behind Sumi and Rei, who'd followed Deidara.

"Hm..." Kisama shrugged, following.

Itachi's room, to say the least, was blinding. The supposed "highlights" of pink were in fact more than highlights. The walls were draped in hot pink fabric, the bed in magenta, and the stone floor covered in a pale pink rug.

"Where'd you find all the pink?" Deidara wondered.

"We brought it with us," they replied in unison, laughing.

Itachi stood in the middle of the room, silently fuming.

* * *

AN: I know, a short chapter... but all of the chapters will probably be short... Review if you'd like. If you want me to keep posting this I have to get at least 1 review. 


	3. Chapter 3

_**The Insanity Chronicals: Ninja's are only the Beginning.**_

_By: Mika Saito and Sumi_

_**Chapter 3- Duck, Duck, Akatsuki Chicken?**_

"I think Itachi-kun is avoiding us, Sumi," Rei stated at breakfast a week later. After turning Itachi's room pink they'd stayed quiet, doing as they were told without question, and without their usual pranks.

"Of course he is, you did turn his room into something from a nightmare in a very short amount of time," Deidara told them.

"Still, how can we have fun with him if he won't come near us?" She pouted.

"He will," Sumi told her, leaning in to reveal her plan.

* * *

"Ready?" Sumi whispered, tightening her grip on the wriggling cage she held.

"Yep," Rei grinned.

"'Kay, release it," she nodded towards the cage in her arms. Rei, still grinning, pulled the cage door open and reached in. She pulled the animal out, and with a laugh released it.

"Now we wait," Sumi set the cage down, watching the released animal run away from them.

_**-1 hour later-**_

The door to the main lounge type room banged open, revealing a very angry Kisame holding a chicken dressed in a small Akatsuki cloak. The feathers of the bird were painted blue, and a miniature sword was strapped across its back.

In essence, the poor chicken looked like a miniature Kisame, only better looking.

"What is the meaning of this?" He demanded, thrusting the bird out in front of him. Deidara, once again seated on the black couch, tried not to laugh. His partner, Sasori, raised a curious eyebrow at Deidara, not really caring that the painted chicken mocked his fellow Akatsuki member. And everyone knows you're not supposed to mock them, lest they decide to kill you.

"What is that, Kisame?" Itachi asked, a dark eyebrow raised over amused crimson eyes.

"That's what I'm trying to figure out," Kisame replied indignantly.

"It looks like a chicken to me," Sumi told him with a straight face. Kisame sputtered.

"Someone's mocking me with it," Kisame growled, shaking the chicken angrily.

"I wonder who it could be..." Deidara mused, watching Sumi and Rei with a wide grin.

"You know it was us... At least you'd be an idiot not to have realized it, I mean, come on... who else could it be?" Rei rolled her eyes. Kisame faltered, shocked.

"Why you..."

"Leave them be," Itachi cut in, his tone amused.

"But..."

"You should take it as a complement," Itachi continued, ignoring Kisame's attempted input, "they took the time to make it look like you, after all." Kisame growled, chucked he chicken at Itachi, and stormed out of the room. The chicken dropped to the floor in front of Itachi, right as Itachi started to laugh at his partner.

* * *

_AN: Hmm... I was debating whether or not I should keep posting, seeing as no one's reviewing, and I do like getting feedback on my writing. I know Sumi and I find this story amusing, or we wouldn't be writing it... but does anyone else??_

_Truthfully, the only reason I posted this was because of the 2 people who have this on their favorites list. Heck, I'm fine with getting just 1 review every now and then, but there's no point in posting if no one's gonna let me know what they think, even if it's just "I like it" or "I hate it."_


	4. Chapter 4

_**The Insanity Chronicles: Ninja's are only the Beginning**_

_By: Mika Saito and Sumi_

_**Chapter 4- In Which There Are Feathers.**_

"This one would be perfect for Itachi-kun," Rei grinned, holding up one of the boa's from the pile that lay between her and Sumi.

"Perfect. This one for Sasori, it'll look cool with his hair," Sumi held up another, setting it to the side.

"Deidara," Rei held up another, an eyebrow raised.

"Only if this one can be for Kisame," Sam yanked one from the bottom of the pile.

"That works," Rei grinned. "What about Zetsu?"

"I haven't seen him around..."

"Neither have I... Should we leave him out?"

"Yeah."

"Good... the venus fly trap thing-a-majig kinda scares me..."

"Yeah... it is creepy..." Sumi agreed.

"I haven't seen Hidan or Kakuzu around either."

"Oh well, their loss," Sumi shrugged.

"Yep. So, how are we going to do this?"

"You do those two," Sumi pointed to Itachi's and Kisame's, "and I'll do these two," she held up Deidara's and Sasori's. "Meet back here in an hour, even if you aren't finished."

"All right. See you in an hour." The two picked up their respective pair of boa's and headed out the door.

_**-1 hour later-**_

"Finished?" Sumi asked when Rei slipped through the door.

"Yep. You?"

"Of course."

"I can't wait until later, it's gonna be fun."

"Yep." They laughed evilly.

* * *

Deidara was already in the dinning room when Rei and Sumi finally ventured out of their room. They hadn't been able to sleep, they'd been too eager to see what chaos their latest prank would bring.

"Morning, Dei-chan," they greeted him, grinning widely at the yellow with multicolor poke-dotted feather boa attached to the collar of his Akatsuki cloak.

"Morning," he responded, watching the warily. "What did you do this time?" He asked before they could say anything.

"What makes you think we _did_ anything?" Rei protested.

"Your smiling. I know how you two are, Orochimaru's been complaining about you two for years."

"We have been bugging him a lot, haven't we, Sumi?" Rei laughed.

"Yeah, but it's fun."

"It is fun to annoy uncle Oreo."

"So what did you two do?" Deidara interrupted. "Wait... Oreo?"

"Our nickname for Uncle. And we're not telling you," they replied in unison, grinning.

"Not telling what?" Sasori asked, walking into the room.

"Nothing," Sumi told him innocently.

"Right..." Sasori rolled his eyes and sat down. Deidara looked at him, and started laughing.

"Itachi, Kisame, and now Sasori... Who's next? Zetsu?" He gasped out between laughs. Sasori raised an eyebrow. "Purple really is your color, Sori-kun," he gasped, unable to control his laughter.

"What are you talking about?"

"The... feather... boa..."

"You mean that yellow atrocity around your neck?" Sasori asked, amused.

"No, I meant the purple one around your neck. I'm not wearing anything yellow, either," he stopped laughing slowly as he looked down at his cloak. Nope, nothing yellow.

"Yes you are," Kisame agreed, walking into the kitchen. Deidara took one look at him and burst out laughing again, almost to the point of rolling around on the floor

Sumi and Rei grinned at each other, slinking closer to the door. The moment someone turned their attention on them, they'd be gone.

"What's going on in here?" Itachi demanded from the hallway. He walked into the kitchen a few moments later, cloak draped over his shoulders, but hanging open.

Deidara had stopped laughing upon hearing his tone of voice, now he started laughing again. Itachi raised an irritated eyebrow at the blond rolling around on the ground.

Kisame and Sasori turned to face him, and started laughing as well. The other eyebrow joined the first.

"Rei... that's not what we'd planned..."

"I know... I went a little overboard..."

"I like."

"What are you laughing at?" Itachi demanded.

"Pink... feather... boa..." Sasori told him, catching his breath.

"I think now is a good time, don't you, Sumi?"

"Yep."

"Apparently someone, or rather a couple of someone's, decided our your cloaks were missing something," Deidara informed him, dusting himself off.

"And yours doesn't have an addition?" Itachi asked, eyeing the yellow... thing... around Sasori's neck.

"Not that I can see..." Deidara looked down again, just in time to see the yellow atrocity, as Sasori had called it, attached to the collar of his cloak appear. Seconds later Itachi growled, realizing what they'd been laughing at.

Kisame had a neon green feather boa attached to the collar of his cloak, Sasori had a bright purple one, Deidara a yellow with multicolor poke-dotted one, and Itachi had a hot pink one. But his wasn't just attached to the collar... it went all the way down the front on both sides of the cloak.

"You brats!" Itachi growled, turning to where he'd seen the two when he'd come in. They weren't there.

"I wonder how long it's going to take them to realize that they can't remove the feather boa's?" Rei mused as she and Sumi walked down the hallway leading away from the dinning hall. Itachi's growl had echoed down the hall after them, sending them into hysterics. But now that they'd somewhat calmed down they had to figure out how long to hide, so that Itachi didn't strangle them... or send them back to Oreo-kun just yet.

"Probably not very long..." Sumi replied, shrugging.

"Get back here you two," Itachi's shout resounded from the dinning room. Sumi and Rei looked at each other, eyes wide, before they took off running down the hallway, laughing.

* * *

AN: This is the last chapter I have typed up, so it may take a tad bit longer between updates this time. I have up to chapter 10 written though, so updates should be regular for a while.

Yay! Reviews! Thank you _**Love 4 Shygirl**_ and **_Dakotarox14_** for reviewing! I hope you enjoyed the chapter and review again.


	5. Chapter 5

_AN: Special note at end! Please enjoy. _

_The Insanity Chronicles: Ninja's are only the Beginning _

_By: Mika Saito and Sumi _

**_Chapter 5- The Pink Feather Boa... RETURNS!!!!!! _**

_**1 week later**_

"... I wonder where the pranksters ran off to?" Deidara mused, flopping onto the black couch.

"Don't know, don't care," Itachi growled, sending a glare in Deidara's direction.

"They're Orochimaru's nieces, don't you think he'd miss them after a while?" Kisame asked.

"Maybe," Itachi grumbled.

"Nope," Deidara said at the same time. " He sent them here because they were bugging the hell out of him. I doubt he'd miss them too much if they just disappeared off the face of the earth."

"Good, then we can leave them missing," Itachi smiled happily.

"Aww. You know you'd miss us!" Sumi poked him, appearing on his right side. Itachi jumped, nearly falling out of the chair.

"No, I wouldn't," he growled.

"Yes you would!" Rei poked him from the other side. He jumped again, this time falling out of the chair with a painful sounding thud.

"Damn you brats," he growled at them, picking himself up off the floor, choosing to stand rather than sit again. Deidara was, by this point, rolling around on the ground laughing.

"So... Looks like you didn't find a way to get the feather boa's off," Sumi grinned evilly at him.

"He took them and burned them," Deidara supplied, finally getting up.

"Aww, and you didn't invite us? We love fire," Sumi pouted. "Oh well, we'll just have to do something with fire then."

"Hell no," Itachi grumbled, going across the room to steal Deidara's couch.

"It's not like we're gonna burn the place down. Then were would we go? Back to Uncle Oreo? He'd just send us somewhere else. We like it here," she followed him, flopping down next to him.

"Do you now?" He growled, looking irritated.

"Yep. Speaking of burning feather boa's, you looked good in that pink one, you should wear it more often," Sumi said with an innocent smile.

Itachi narrowed his eyes. "You think? Maybe you and the other brat should be wearing them. You're the only females here."

"Nah. We don't like pink. We've been wearing red and black ones," she shrugged, looking up at Sasori as he came into the room. Seeing the look in his eyes, she got up and retreated across the room.

"Itachi... What the hell did you do to yourself?" The red head asked, looking both amused, and appalled.

"What do you mean?" Itachi looked confused.

Sasori rolled his eyes. "What's with all the green and pink? And I thought you burned that cloak..."

"What the hell are you on, Sasori?" Itachi asked, looking down at his cloak.

"Whatever it is, share!" Deidara shouted from halfway across the room.

"Shut up Dei-chan, this is the interesting part," Rei poked him.

"All right, all right," He pouted. "What did you guys do?"

"You'll see," Sumi told him, watching Itachi's reaction.

"Nothing," Sasori rolled his eyes. "Your hat is pink and green. What the hell did you do to it?"

Itachi glared in Deidara's general direction while taking his hat off... and promptly throwing it at Sumi.

"What the hell did you do to it?" He demanded.

"Nothing," Sumi protested, smiling innocently at him. "I was in your sight the whole time."

"Right, like I'm going to believe you didn't do it. Who else here would?"

"I would!" Deidara said, waving at the threatening figure of the elder Uchiha.

"Shut up, Dei-chan," Rei poked him again.

"I honestly didn't do anything though," Sumi told him, putting the hat on.

"Take that off," he growled, glaring at the hat.

"Why should I? You threw it at me."

"I thought you didn't like pink..." Deidara said, looking confused.

"I don't."

"Then why do you want to wear a fuzzy pink and green hat with a pink bead fringe?" He asked.

"Because," she shrugged.

"Take it off, and give it back," Itachi growled.

"You threw it at me, so... not happening."

"It's mine!!"

"So? What are you, a little kid? I thought you were 17, not 2."

"Why you..." He growled, activating his mangekyou sharingan.

"Now now. This is going a tad bit too far, Ita-kun," Deidara said, stepping in front of Sumi.

"Ita-kun?" Itachi asked, using tsukuyomi on Deidara rather than Sumi.

* * *

_**1 hour later**_

"When do you think he'll stop torturing Dei-chan?" Rei asked, poking Itachi in the middle of his new psychedelic headband.

"I dunno, but I hope he doesn't hurt Dei-chan too much..." Sumi responded.

* * *

_**1 hour later**_

Itachi blinked, right as Sumi and Rei poked the headband again.

"What are you doing?" He growled.

"Nothing," they grinned. "We'll be leaving now." They each grabbed one of Deidara's arms and pulled him out of the room with them.

* * *

"Dei-chan," Rei poked the blonde-haired man. "You okay?" She asked when he finally opened his eyes. 

"Ugh..." he groaned, looking pained.

"Guess not," Sumi noted.

"Yeah," Rei poked the man again. "I wonder what Ita-kun did to him," she mused.

"Yeah, he certainly took long enough to do whatever it was he did."

"I know," Rei agreed, poking him a third time.

"Let's leave him alone for a while, maybe he'll tell us about it later..."

"Hopefully..."

* * *

_**Later that day**_

Sumi and Rei sat in the living room area talking when Itachi re-appeared, still dressed in the cloak he had been earlier (a.k.a the cloak that was turned pink and with lime green clouds, and the pink feather boa back around the collar and front, and this time the hem as well) and the psychedelic headband.

"Oh, so you two finally reappeared. Are you planning ways to get back at me for what I did to Deidara?"

The two didn't even look at him. They'd fallen silent the moment he walked in. After he finished talking they got up and left.

Itachi glared in the direction of the two.

* * *

"You think the silent treatment will really work?" Rei asked after they'd left the room. 

"Yep," Sumi nodded, "we just have to be patient, and not pull any pranks for a while."

"Okies."

* * *

_**3 weeks later**_

"Are you sure you don't wanna tell us?" Rei badgered, poking Deidara. She got a mumbled response.

"Aw, come on, we wanna know," Sumi pressed. She got another mumbled response.

"I don't think he's going to talk," Sasori noted dryly.

"Shut up, blonde," Rei glared at the redhead.

"I'm not a blonde..."

"I know that, but I couldn't think of anything else to call you," she shrugged.

"Brat," he muttered as Itachi walked in. Everyone fell silent.

"We'll just leave now," Deidara mumbled, leaving the room with Sasori and Kisame right behind him.

"I can't take it anymore! For three weeks straight you've done nothing to no one, what is going on! What has been running through your minds all this time?" He practically yelled once the other three were out of the room.

The two exchanged looks before walking up to him. Together they poked him.

"You pass!" They grinned, then turned and walked out of the room.

"Wha?" Itachi looked confused.

* * *

_AN: Special note: We have doodles! Sumi has done doodlings of some scenes from almost every chapter. We were going to post the links in this chapter, but my computer doesn't like photobucket, so they aren't uploaded yet. The links will be posted on my bio page within a week though._


End file.
